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Redneck jokesYou might be a redneck if...
- More than one living relative is named...
- You think the stock market...
- You think the O.J. trial was...
- You've ever lost a loved one to...
- Your boat has not...
- Your front porch collapses and more than six...
- You've ever used lard in...
- Your coffee table used to be a...
- You keep a can of Raid on...
- You've ever used a toilet seat as a...
- Your home has more...
- Your Christmas tree is...
- You've ever been arrested for...
- You think that potted meat on a...
- There is a stuffed possum...
- You hammer bottle caps into the...
- You've ever shot anyone for...
- You own a homemade...
- Your wife can climb a tree faster than...
- Your momma has "ammo" on her...
- You've totaled every...
- There are more than five McDonald's bags currently on the...
- Momma taught you how to...
- There is a wasp nest in your...
- The Home Shopping Channel operator...
- You give your dad a gallon of Pepto-Bismol for...
- There has ever been crime-scene tape on...
- You burn your front yard rather than...
- You consider a six-pack and a bug-zapper...
- Fewer than half of your cars...
- You've ever been kicked out of the zoo for...
- The taillight covers of your car are...
- Your car has never had a...
- Any of your kids were...
- Your momma has ever been involved in a...
- You think a subdivision is part of a...
- You've ever bathed with...
- Your good deed for the month was...
- Your wheelbarrow breaks and it takes four relatives to...
- Your momma doesn't remove the Marlboro from her lips before...
- You stand under the mistletoe at Christmas and wait for...
- Your favorite T-shirt is...
- You've ever been involved in a custody fight over a...
- You're an expert on...
- The dog catcher calls for a backup unit when...
- Your wife has ever said...
- Your family tree does not...
- The flood history of the area can be seen on...
- You haul more than...
- Your momma has ever stomped into the house and announced...
- There is a gun rack on your...
- Your wedding was held in...
- Your soap on a rope doubles as an...
- Your wife's hairdo attracts...
- Your baby's first words are...
- The antenna on your truck is a danger to...
- Your primary source of income is...
- You pick your teeth from...
- You've ever financed a...
- You refer to the time you won a free case of oil as...
- Your hairdo has ever been ruined by a...
- Your mother has been involved in a fist fight at a...
- You've ever barbecued...
- You own all the components of soap on a rope...
- The best way to keep things cold is to leave'em in the...
- You've ever raked leaves in your...
- The neighbors started a petition over...
- Your brother-in-law is...
- Your entire family has ever sat around waiting for a call from the...
- You go to the family reunion to...
- your grandmother has ever been asked to leave a...
- You can't tell what color your...
- You have refused to watch the Academy Awards since...
- None of your shirts cover...
- Your only condiment on the dining room table is...
- The rear tires on your car are...
- You consider "Outdoor Life"...
- You prominently display a gift you bought at...
- You use the term `over yonder'...
- Birds are attracted to your...
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