More redneck jokes You might be a redneck if... You've never paid for a... You consider a three piece suit to be... There is a sheet hanging in your closet and... You think the Mountain Men in Deliverance were... You've ever made change in the... The fifth grade is referred to as... You consider a good tan to be... You own at least 20... You think a 'cursor' is... You know of at least six different ways to... You can change the oil in your truck without... When you run out of gas... Your screen door has no... Your biggest ambition in life is to... Three quarters of the clothes you own have... Your grandfather completely executes the... When you leave your house, you are followed by... You have a house that's mobile and... Your gene pool doesn't have a... Your `huntin dawg' cost more than... You have a Hefty bag for a... Your belt buckle weighs more than... You have an Elvis... You have the taxidermist's... You own more cowboy boots than... You've been to a funeral and there were more... You have a picture of Johnny Cash, Willie Nelson, or Elvis... You just bought an 8-track player to... There are four or more cars up on... It's easier to spray weed killer on your lawn than... You think that John Deere Green, Ford Blue, and Primer Gray are... You've ever climbed a water tower with a... Your vehicle has a two-tone paint job... The tobacco chewers in your family aren't... Your momma calls you over to help, cause she has a... The ASPCA raids your... You have to check in the bottom of your shoe... You can't get married to your sweetheart because... You celebrate Groundhog Day because... Your kid takes a siphon hose to... You've been on TV more than 5 times describing... You fish in your above-ground pool. . . and... When a sign that says "Say No To Crack!" reminds you to... Your beer can collection is considered... Getting a package from your post office requires... Your wife wants to stop at the gas station to see if they've got... You dated your daddy's current wife in... You're moved to tears every time you hear... You grow Vidalia onions, rather than... Your Momma would rather go to the racetrack than... The most serious loss from the earthquake was your... You have spent more on your pickup truck than... You've ever hit a deer with your car... You can tell your age by the number of... Your momma gives you tips on how to... Exxon and Conoco have offered you royalties for... Your dad is also your favorite... Your classes at school were cancelled because the path... During your senior year you and your... You're a lite beer drinker, because you start drinking... On your first date you had to ask your Dad to borrow... Your parakeet knows the phrase... You saved lots of money on your honeymoon by... In tough situations you ask yourself... Taking your wife on a cruise means... You think the last words to the Star Spangled Banner are... You have a color coordinating rope that... You bring your dog to... Your grandmother can correctly execute the... You've ever held somebody up with a... You have every episode of... Your favorite hunting dog has a bigger tombstone than... Your masseuse uses... Your wife's best shoes have... You use your fishing license as... On stag night, you take a... You use a 55 Chevy as a... Your back porch is bigger than... There is more oil in your cap than... You think a hot tub is a...
